CIGARETTE:
A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end and a fool at the other!

LECTURE:
An art of transmitting information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of students without passing through the minds of either.

CONFERENCE:
The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

CONFERENCE ROOM:
A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

COMPROMISE:
The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

TEARS:
The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine water-power!

ECSTASY:
A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.

CLASSIC:
A book which people praise, but never read.

SMILE:
A curve that can set a lot of things straight!

OFFICE:
A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

EXPERIENCE:
The name men give to their mistakes.

DIPLOMAT:
A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.

OPTIMIST:
A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway "See, I am not injured yet!"

MISER:
A person who lives poor so that he can die RICH!

FATHER:
A banker provided by nature.

BOSS:
Someone who is early when you are late, and late when you are early.

POLITICIAN:
One who shakes your hand before elections and your confidence later.

DOCTOR:
A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by his bills!

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